Prayer for dealing with hurts

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Continued from Part III, Seven Promises of Forgiveness

Steps in Prayer to find relief and release from the pain of having been hurt by someone -

Some like to have a Prayer Partner to walk through this with.  Others prefer it to be just between them and God.  Either way, Go before God in prayer and…

1. · Identify the hurt you feel.
2. · Admit you are angry.
3. · Admit you want to hurt back.
4. · Acknowledge that hurting back is futile, damaging and increases evil.
5. · Release the need and choose not to hurt back.
6. · Absorb the hurt for Jesus' sake.
7. · Turn your self and hurt over to God.
8. · Turn your "enemy" over to God, trusting Him for justice.
9. · Meditate on the justice and mercy of God
10. · Feel your enemy's need for mercy in the face of God's justice.
11. · Pray for your enemy from a heart of compassion.
12. · Look beyond their faults and see their needs.
13. · Respond to their needs rather than punish them for their faults.
14. · Thank God for lifting the burden of justice from you and fore making you a minister of mercy, reconciliation and healing.
15. · Worship God who is glorious in satisfying both justice and love.

BLESS YOU -


END
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Seven Promises of Forgiveness

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Continued from Part II - What is Forgiveness?

(Pastor Jeff Kingery, Ronan, Montana, sermon Nov. 21, 2004)

Forgiveness does not come easily to most of us. So here are some steps we can follow to help us along, learning to Forgive...

Promises I make, between myself and God:
Stage 1)  I Promise....

· I will not return hurt to my "enemy."
· I will not keep thinking about the incident and brood over it.
· I will pray for my "enemy" and bless and not curse.


Stage 2) I Promise....

· I will not bring this incident up and use it against my "enemy."
· I will not talk about this incident to others. (Very, VERY Important...)
· I will not allow this incident to stand between us or hinder our relationship
· I will pray for healing and reconciliation as a brother/sister in Christ.

I will Promise and I will pray for these above points.

But...how do I pray for healing and reconciliation?  How do I cope with the tremendous pain I had felt, especially if this other person has not apologized, has not acknowledged being wrong, and remains difficult?

Part IV - Prayer for Dealing with Hurts -
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What is Forgiveness?

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Continued from Part I - Why Forgive?

What is Forgiveness?

From the Encarta World English Dictionary:

Definitions of forgiveness (n)
for·give·ness [ fər gívnəss ]
1. act of pardoning somebody: the act of pardoning somebody for a mistake or wrongdoing
2. forgiving quality: the tendency to forgive offenses readily and easily
Synonyms: pardon, absolution, amnesty, reconciliation, exoneration, exculpation

The Oxford English Dictionary

-  'to grant free pardon and to give up all claim on account of an offense or debt'.

There is currently no agreed upon psychological definition in research literature. From a purely Christian percpective, when someone hurts you wrongly, they incur a debt to you. Forgiveness is choosing not to collect the debt, turning it over to God to pay or collect, and blessing the one who owes you.

Easier said than done. The question is -is an apology required prior to forgiving?  For most people - we'd sure like to see some humilty and repentance before we forgive them.  We want them down a peg or two - at the very least, acknowledging that they know they did something wrong.  But should we be waiting for or looking for that?

From a health perspective, studies show that people who forgive are happier and healthier than those who don't. A University of Wisconsin study found "the more forgiving people were, the less they suffered from a wide range of illnesses. The less forgiving people reported a greater number of health problems." (Dr. Robert Enright, Forgiveness is a Choice, American Psychological Association , 2001 ISBN 1-55798-757-2)

Therefore, waiting for an apology might not be in YOUR best interest.  It might never come, and you will have wasted your life and happiness waiting for it.

For your own sake as well as the sake of people around you - Forgiveness is choosing not to hurt back, turning the matter over to God, and blessing the one who has hurt you.

Part III - How To: The Seven Promises of Forgiveness -
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